Learning to let go of things in life is not easy. It seems that only after we lose someone that we realize we shouldn’t sweat the small stuff, but the aftermath of a death can be a period where we go through so many conflicting emotions. But what can we do to navigate the immediate aftermath of death?
One of the biggest issues we can have after we lose someone involves not being able to express our emotions properly. Or we could think that we’ve got to maintain a “stiff upper lip.” The fact is that everybody deals with grief in their own way, and some people find it really helpful to talk about the story of their loss. Some people do not feel like talking about it, and that is ok. You should never feel pressured to talk about it. But you can express yourself in other ways. You can write in a journal, or you could create a poem or a story. There is no right or wrong way to express yourself.
There are a number of ways to get support throughout this difficult process. You could go to a grief support group, and this can help you to consolidate feelings of pain, and help you feel like you are not alone. This can be especially true in the case of support groups that help people who are going through grief arising from specific illnesses or accidents. Of course, death is not just something that gradually happens, it can be instant. There are also circumstances that could have been prevented, especially with regards to wrongful death. And it can be helpful as a part of the process to start working through this in a productive manner. It could be through a support group, but it could also be through professional organizations. Even dedicated wrongful death lawyers can provide you with a sense of entitlement because you are able to start dealing with what has happened. Support occurs in many ways, and the most important lesson arising from this is that you don’t have to be alone with your pain because there are many resources that can help.
Preserving Memories of the Person
One of the most important aspects of grief is about keeping the memory alive. Many people think that death is something that happens and then we have to move on with life, but we do not all subscribe to this frame of mind. When we are going through grief, it’s amazing what little things we can do to help preserve someone’s memory but actually help us feel better in the process. Grief is not just about processing the thoughts that come with losing someone, but it’s about understanding that, while they’re not here in a literal sense, they left their mark on the world in so many other ways. When you start to create a tribute to the person by doing something in the real world, like planting a tree, or even taking part in a charity walk or run, it’s these things that will give us strength in the most unlikely of ways.
Others Are Going Through the Same Thing
Many people, in those first few days after someone’s death, have to go through a lot of the admin, such as dealing with the lawyers, preparing the funeral, and so on. And when we start to meet with other family members to go through these things, it can be a very comforting experience. There are so many families who have gone through the death of a loved one in the modern-day because of the pandemic, and have found solace in those Zoom calls and having random quizzes online, and these things have helped because everybody is going through the same shared emotion. There are stories of people who have uncontrollable fits of laughter at the funeral, because of a variety of emotions, but it is also a shared cathartic experience. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. And when we are going through the same things, it can help us to process them in our own ways.
Those first few weeks after a death are some of the most topsy-turvy you will ever experience. There is that temptation to get on with normal life, but there’s also a lot of interesting moments to be had. Perhaps having a conversation with a sibling where you just talk about random things, and it’s amazing what the aftermath of the death can do to us in a variety of ways.